Hoi An, Mui Ne and Ho Chi Minh

Before we got to Vietnam we'd heard a few negative reviews about how it was dirty, busy and how the locals were unfriendly so I wasn't sure what to expect. I found the Vietnamese to be warm and helpful people. Ha Noi and Mue Ne were super relaxed towns and I didn't really experience any major issue with hygiene levels so I'm not sure if we were just lucky or if perhaps India just set a very, very, very ... very, very low benchmark? Either way, I thought Vietnam was a lovely country. Apart from the amazing food, Ha Noi was probably the highlight for me being a very beautiful and picturesque town with some great spots to eat and drink. While we were there we also did a 1 day diving trip to the Cham Islands - the diving wasn't quite what it has been in Malaysia or Indonesia but I still enjoyed it and the islands hid some stunning idyllic beaches (which would have been even nicer without the rain!).

Rolling on the river with our lovely guide, Mui who tried in vain to teach us to speak Vietnamese:

The Japanese covered bridge:

Selling candles to float down the river:

Hoi An by night:

Mui Ne is a beach town where we had time to relax and top up our fading tans, although I over did it somewhat and ended up more rouged than bronzed! Another day tour here took us to the fairy stream ... Which is really just a stream and to the red and white sand dunes ... which were really just sand dunes. Cata decided she'd rent a quad bike to zoom around the dunes on which I sat on screaming for all of 10 seconds... I hate the bloody things after a somewhat embarrassing experience in Greece involving bad steering, a giant bush and some attractive male witnesses (The worst kind of witness to any embarrassing incident).

Cocktails on the beach:

The fairy stream:

Sand dunes:

After all that relaxation we dived right back into the hustle and bustle of Ho Chi Minh -though I prefer to call it by its old name, Saigon because it easier and it sounds more exotic... As the capital of South Vietnam this was also the olace to learn about the Vietnam war. Travelling through South East Asia you get a feel for how the whole region suffered relatively recently during the war against communism, but it's only in Vietnam where you really get to see the deep impact that it caused and also insights into how the locals view the conflict. Plenty of shops sell old Vietnamese propaganda posters which although visually striking have pretty dark anti-American messages behind them. Messages such as 'What are you doing here? For whom are you dying?', '3000 enemy planes shot down' 'Nixon the murderer' respectively accompanying images of American soldiers, USAF war planes and the American president portrayed as a monster. There is definitely a sense that the war here was  not an conflict between the communists and the anti-communists but a war against the invading Americans. This theme continues into the rather one sided and harrowing war museum. Plenty of quotes from journalists and World organisations discrediting the inhumane actions of the US during the war hang on the walls alongside horrific pictures and accounts of the terrible war crimes that were committed. In any situation where man is 'legally' killing man atrocities are carried out and innocent people suffer and die, so in a war that spanned over 20 years you can imagine that there was plenty on show to be horrified by. Photographs of dead women and children, annihilated villages, the effects of chemical warfare which the people in South Vietnam suffer even now due to the prolonged effects of the previously untested Agent Orange, which can affect genes across several generations. Outside in the courtyard a collection of US military vehicles and weapons including tanks and fighter jets as well as a chinook helicopter gives you a real sense of what these people were ip against. Of course losses were suffered on both sides, the USA suffered 58,000 military deaths due to the war ... but in a death toll of up to 3 million more than half of those killed were Vietnamese civilians. Although the museum clearly gives a one sided view, with statistics like that it's very clear to see that something went terribly wrong here.

With 53 year old Song whose legs of steel have been cycling around these streets for the past 20 years!:

 

American military vehicles:

 

One of the many massacres including that occurred during the war:

Ha Noi and Halong

From the most relaxed capital city in South East Asia we dived right into hectic Ha Noi... By European standards it's totally insane ... By Asian standards, on a scale of 1 to India it hits about a 5, hovering just below Bangkok. Still, it took a bit of time to adjust to all the hustle and bustle after laid back Laos, but once we did the city managed to win me over. Drinking beer on the street sat on little plastic stools with street vendors, tuk tuk drivers, mopeds and cars whizzing past makes for a good experience and the countless little alleyways packed with quirky little bars, restaurants and cafes blaring everything from techno to pop to live lounge music give this city an infectious charm. 

The lake in Ha Noi:

Beers on the street:

However what has really impressed me about Vietnam so far is the beautiful, beautiful food - these people know how to eat! Everything from the Banh Mi (Vietnamese baguettes) and coconut filled pastries you can get on the street to the delicate white rose dumplings and delicious coconut curries. Not to mention my favourite, the fresh spring rolls. Enjoy my Halong Bay bikini pics because at the rate I'm eating in this country my next posts are going to be typed up by some pretty chubby fingers!

I'm not too sure what can be said about Halong Bay other than its status as one of the natural wonders of the World is well deserved in my humble opinion. We did a 2 day boat cruise where we got to spend one magical night sleeping between these beautiful limestone mounds under the light of a full moon ... Along with the rest of the World admittedly, but honestly it didn't really matter, in fact the sight of all the boats at night lighting up the bay was beautiful in itself. The myth behind the bay (literal translations is 'descending dragon bay') is that when enemies were attacking the area, the gods summoned a dragon who breathed a wall of jewels around the area, in the meantime the almost 2000 limestone islands we see today sprung up in the way of attacking ships. Apparently the dragon liked the area so much that she stuck around and still lurks there to this day. The eerie atmosphere of the place can almost make you believe it - there is something about being there that makes you want to stick a parrot on your shoulder and hobble around shouting 'arggg matey' at everyone. Maybe that's just me? Never mind...

Halong Bay - so good it deserves a collage:

With our fellow passengers:

Twinkle twinkle:

Key info: Booking a Halong Bay cruise can be a little daunting with the thousands of options available. We finally went with the relatively budget option of Carnival Cruises and they were great. Apparently the cheapest: gold or white pearl are terrible.

Ubud and Lembongan

After Gili we headed to the cultural capital of Bali, Ubud, where we did some suitably cultural things. On our first night we went to see some traditional Balinese dancing which consisted of about 15 men on xylophones accompanying women wrapped in tightly fitting fabric and seemingly trying to escape their behinds while waving their arms and looking rather alarmed:

There was something quite entrancing about the show though, from the eerie, repetitive music to the bright costumes and wild expressions... My highlight was definitely this thing though:

That, apparently, is Barong - a mythical beast representative of good... After he faffs around with a man in a gorilla suit for awhile some men come on stage and stab themselves... It's all quite bizarre and I've been having nightmares ever since!

The next day we took a cycling tour from the top of one of the volcanoes... 

Sadly the weather was terrible so the view from the top looked something like this:

Which is a shame as apparently it's beautiful at the top... On the way down we were shown around a typical Balinese house. These typically have a kitchen, 3 living spaces for 3 generations of the family (the youngest inherits the house and the responsibility of care for his elders - girls move in with their husbands family) and a family temple. The house we visited had a farm behind it which was great for cooing at pigs but apparently no gauge for the wealth of the family. If you want to keep up with the Joneses out here the key is to check out the fanciness of their temple - gold decorations and intricate carvings are indicators of a wealthy family.

Normal temple:

Fancy temple:

Piggy!:

There was a religious festival on whilst we were there and the household had prepared a religious 'offering' which apparently gets eaten at the end of the day... Cake with fruit, flowers and a chicken anyone? Make of it what you will...

Finally we took a silver making 'class' where we got given 5g of silver to play with and turned a plain slab of metal into slightly twisted slabs of metal that we could hang off our ears and our fingers.

OK - so it may not be the most beautiful jewellery you've ever seen but it's definitely one of a kind and it was good fun too!

After Ubud we headed back to the beach on the island of Lembongan where I got to scuba dive with manta rays which really was as awesome as it sounds! We also met some Californians who kindly shared their freshly caught fish with us before heading to the worst bar in Asia to listen to a guy shred his guitar to a pre-recorded backing track... Standard Indonesian night out methinks!

Kuta and Gili Trawangan

Before we got here we'd heard plenty of mixed reviews about Bali which made us a little apprehensive after the India saga. We'd been told that it was dirty and that people hassle you all the time and we weren't sure we were ready to jump back into that sort of environment... I'm not sure if it's because we avoided Kuta Beach and stayed in Legian, or because Bali just isn't actually that bad at all but we loved it. It definitely wasn't anywhere near the chaos of India! 

Our primary raison d'être in Legian was to take surfing lessons... We looked at the options at the big fancy surf schools but it was a little too expensive so we settled for just paying some of the local set ups on the beach and that worked out just fine. My conclusion is that surfing is the most tiring, least rewarding sport on the planet - As a beginner you spend 20 minutes trying to catch the smallest of waves and if you're really lucky you'll get to spend all of 4 seconds standing on a board clumsily, looking something like a hybrid between a drowned rat and a lame duck, then the next day every muscle in your body aches... However, it's SO much fun and as you don't actually have to see yourself looking totally awkward, for those four seconds, in your mind, you ARE Kelly Slater which makes it all completely worth it!  Here is a blurry photo of me looking more or less like I know what I'm doing:

(Disclaimer: Australian muscle man instructor not necessarily included.)

And one of me looking how I looked the rest of the time...

Other than surf, we ate lots of amazing sea food and fruit juices and checked out the funky bars and restaurants scattered about the area. The Seminyak area is Bali's answer to Mayfair with lots of upmarket boutiques and expensive looking cafes/lounge bars. The food/drink is relatively cheap everywhere but the shopping was a lot cheaper in India which meant we resisted spending our many millions of Rupiah.

After getting bashed about by waves we headed to the much talked about Gili islands - The largest island, Gili Trawangan, is the most popular and therefore busiest island. Although not quite as stunning as the Perhentian Islands it certainly couldn't invite any complaints - again blue skies and lovely beaches but the real highlights for me were all to be found under the water. As soon as we got there I headed straight for a dive shop and signed up for my Advanced Openwater Course after all of about 5 seconds of persuasion. Again I'll try and not to reel on about every single fish I saw but there were plenty of green sea turtles of all sizes (I saw 5 on my first dive alone) and I saw my first shark which also seemed to have seen me... Apparently I looked terrified which isn't surprising as this beautiful 1 metre long white-tip swam past me and then right around me with its beady eye checking me out... Don't sharks circle their prey?! Anyway I survived and in hindsight, from the comfort of my hotel room and with my heart beat back to normal it was bloody awesome! I also did my first night dive which was a strange experience... I'm not particularly keen on the dark above water so wasn't sure I'd particularly enjoy it under the water! It turned out to be good fun but I still think I will be sticking to the day time from now on! Anyway, I'll shut up now because I'm seriously addicted to scuba and I could probably go on and on for days.

Diving during the day (or night) was followed by partying in to the early hours and one of the many bars lined up along the main strip. On our last evening there we visited the turtle hatchery where tens of the tiniest baby turtles are kept until they are big enough to improve their chances of survival. Mini sea turtles?! How can you go wrong with that? Needless to say the cute-o-meter was off the scale... Here's another not very good photo to make your little hearts swell:

Leaving these paradises always proves to be difficult but with a whole continent to be seen and time slowly running away from us we just about managed to pull ourselves away.

Rainbow on the beach:

Us on the beach:

Diving, diving, diving!

On the boat back:

A very happy lady in her 1980s life jacket...

Mount Batur volcano:

Lombok:

Us again:

Key info - Bali:

Hostel - M Hostel, Legian. You have to walk through a pharmacy to get here which is odd, if not useful, but it's clean, comfy and in a good location for Legian Beach.

Key info - Gili T

Accommodation - Warna Bungalows. Nice, clean room - ideal location for the beach. Far enough from the action to be quiet and close enough to be convenient.

Dive school - Blue Marlin. Fun, sociable place and a great instructor able to deal with me at my slowest due to hangovers!